Tales of the sharpshooter
by setr
Summary: He sees more than you think and not all his tales are lies. A collection of one-shots though some might fit together. Random pairings, open to suggestions. I do not own One Piece.
1. Midnight visits and pieces of the puzzle

_To my darling Galleta whose reviews are always there making my day brighter. Here is a fic from a nakama's POV as suggested. Just a little treat since the last week of the month is upon us once again._

pairing: ZoRo with mentions of LuNa  
rating: T

**Midnight visits and pieces of the puzzle**

Everyone assumed that it was either Robin or Nami that knew the most about the going-ons of the Straw hat crew and while it was true that Nami tried to know as much as she could after all knowledge was power and knowledge of secrets was profitable. Also no one could deny that Robin had a knack for knowing things sometimes before that person even did but while she observed the rest of the crew from what would appear to be a detached stance she wasn't the only one who observed and noticed things. He saw things that no one else did, he saw their tales unfold.

Usopp didn't always realize what he was seeing though, it had taken him a month to realize what Luffy had been up to. He had noticed Luffy slipping out of his hammock after nightfall and quietly out of the room returning in the early morning before Sanji rose to make breakfast. Usopp had at first assumed that he was trying to get food but come morning their food supply wouldn't be touched. It wasn't until one morning when Luffy had snuck back into the room looking particularly satisfied that Usopp had picked up on the faintest smell of tangerines and noticed the small bruise at the crook of his neck. After this realization he started noticing all the extra looks between the captain and his navigator and the way Nami worried just a little bit more when Luffy did something stupid like fall overboard.

Usopp soon saw the signs of their blossoming love in every action however the other lovers were not as easy to determine. They were much more secretive and hidden with their affections. He had first seen a potential sign several months ago one night when Zoro had been on watch. Usopp hadn't been able to sleep and he had finally decided to get some water from the kitchen.

_Several months earlier, night time_

Usopp quietly left the men's quarters so as not to disturb anyone, just because he was having trouble sleeping he shouldn't rob the others of theirs even if it would be fun. He was halfway to the galley when he saw a shadow move across the what he had thought to be empty deck. Fear gripped his body and he pressed up against a wall concealing himself in the shadows. Thinking that it was perhaps only Zoro he peered up at the crow's nest however he noticed the tip of Zoro's green hair leaned back against the mast. His heart raced as he realized Zoro was probably sleeping and had let an intruder sneak on to Merry. This intruder was probably going to kill them all in their sleep and take everything. He needed to do something to stop them, he was the only one who could save the crew now. He made a move to step out of the shadows but he was frozen in shock, well almost frozen his knees were shaking like crazy and there was a slight tremor going through his body yet he was still unable to move or even call out to the sleeping swordsman.

There was a creak and Usopp realized the intruder was headed for the crow's nest, he watched in fear as a dark figure appeared at the bottom of the mast then slowly started to climb up. Usopp nearly screamed when he saw that the intruder had three arms and was carrying some object in their third hand. The figure moved up the ladder slowly and as they climbed they entered into the bathing glow of the moonlight. Usopp slumped to the floor in relief as the moonlight illuminated Robin who was using one of her Hana Hana hands to carry a thermos of what he assumed to be coffee. Robin disappeared over the edge and Usopp saw the tips of green move acknowledging her presence. He watched for a few more minutes but Robin didn't reappear and he couldn't make out any voices. Water forgotten he returned to the sleeping quarters and fell into a fitful sleep.

_Present time_

Usopp hadn't thought much about it the next morning, the event partially forgotten and partially pushed aside as it was probably just Robin being polite since she couldn't sleep. He looked over to where they sat now; Robin reading on the deck, Zoro asleep with his head in her lap. It was evident to everyone that they were completely at ease with each other, Zoro was sleeping peacefully without the usual energy vibrating off him like a deflector shield and Robin's hand played idly in his hair. It had taken the couple time for this ease to develop, in the beginning there had been awkwardness and tension, another clue in the puzzle that Usopp had slowly pieced together.

_A few months ago, another clue_

Usopp slowly put away the tools he had out, he had been working on some new stars for battle use out on the deck. Zoro was finishing up his katas his focus on the swift movements he was making and he didn't see what Usopp did. From her chair Robin was looking over the top of her book at Zoro no doubt admiring his demon-strength. She shook her head lightly and looked back at her book only to shut it a few seconds later. She was visibly frazzled and it surprised Usopp, the older woman was always calm hiding her emotions behind the stoic exterior. He watched intrigued as she put her book down and stood up her eyes still on the training swordsman. Robin took a step in his direction before stopping, she stood there for a minute supposedly an inner debate going on in her mind before twirling on her heel and heading in the opposite direction. She took about ten steps, Usopp counted, before pausing the debate raging again. Whatever was going through her mind she seemed to come to a decision and she walked briskly to the galley without another backward glance.

Usopp was sitting there still trying to puzzle out what he had just seen when Zoro finished his exercises and immediately glanced at the now empty lounge chair. Something akin to disappointment flashed through his eyes and he stared at the empty chair for awhile. Then all of a sudden he snatched up his weights and started another set of exercises this time more forcefully and without the usual grace he possessed. Usopp looked from the swordsman to the door of the galley through which Robin had disappeared. Something was definitely going on between those two. He vowed to pay closer attention to them and find out what.

Awhile later Sanji called for dinner, the usual sing-song for the girls and a barked command to the rest of the crew afterwards. Usopp rushed in anxious to get some food before Luffy ate it all. Robin was already seated inside and every now and then she would glance at the door and finally Zoro walked through covered in sweat. Robin's eyes rested on him for a brief moment before turning to ask Chopper a question about some medicine he had been working on earlier a polite smile in place.

"Shitty swordsman you're stinking up the place" Sanji growled

"You going to do something about it?" Zoro hissed already reaching for his katana.

The two looked ready to go at it then and there even more than usual and they probably would have torn the kitchen apart if it hadn't been for Nami. She rose from her seat and sent them death glares that had Sanji swooning and even silenced Zoro. The rest of the dinner passed by seemingly normally and to the majority of the crew it probably was. There were three members however who knew something was going on and Usopp was surreptitiously watching the other two. There were several sidelong glances and glares exchanged and Usopp couldn't tell if they were becoming closer or worse. At one point Zoro seemed to spasm slightly and his entire body stiffened, the glare he sent Robin after that made Usopp's knees shake under the table. It was dark, intense with just a hint of something that made Usopp think of desperation making the look all that much more scarier. Robin meanwhile simply continued to chat with her crewmates her mask in place no sign of a crack.

As soon as dinner was finished Zoro hightailed it out of the kitchen shouting something about needing a shower because of his workout on the way out. At his departure Robin seemed to allow herself a small smirk before once again masking it. Usopp was curious as to what her part in Zoro's sudden departure was, their relationship was definitely changing he just wasn't sure how yet.

After that night Usopp paid closer attention to the two guarded nakama, from what he could tell the majority of their interactions happened at night under the veil of darkness or a canopy of stars. When Zoro had night watch Robin would join him and for his part Zoro would volunteer to take more shifts. Slowly time passed, battles were fought and bounties rose. Zoro and Robin seemed to be less awkward around each other and there stopped being so many glares. If you asked him Usopp would say that he knew then and there it was love but truth be told he wasn't sure if something was growing between them or if they were simply back to normal.

They weren't as careless as Luffy and Nami had been. No marks were made at least not any visible ones that Usopp could see. Though there was a couple days where Zoro trained with his wife beater on instead of topless. At the time Usopp had chocked it up to the cooler weather but once a few other things fell into place he realized Robin must have slipped up on the no visible marks thing they had going on. Minor changes started to become evident to Usopp. Zoro would laugh more often, glare at Sanji when he flirted with Robin and would sleep even more during the day. Robin seemed to be more relaxed and every once in awhile Usopp would catch her staring off into the horizon with a real smile on her lips. Each day Usopp seemed to be collecting more pieces of the puzzle and he wondered what the final picture would be.

They seemed to be getting along fine in whatever situation they had going and Usopp began to think they might come out to the crew. That was before Water 7 though. Something changed between them before they arrived in that town, there had obviously been a fight. A day or two before docking found Zoro in a foul mood come morning. He had been on night watch the previous night and at breakfast he was particularly surly. He picked a fight with Sanji over anything and everything and Nami's glares and threats didn't even slow him down. The rest of the time he was deathly silent, an ominous aura surrounding him. He was so dark that even Luffy avoided him. Robin sunk into a silence as well, escaping in her books finishing one after another in record time. Her usual polite smile seemed more forced than anything and quite often she would get a blank look in her eyes as if her being was no longer on the ship.

The events that followed after arriving in Water 7 drove Zoro and Robin's issues out of Usopp's mind and it wasn't until he was on the train with her under the guise of Sogeking that it re-entered. He saw the look in her eyes, the determination to sacrifice herself for her nakama and it dawned on him that she loved Zoro. When he met up with Zoro again he knew that her feelings were reciprocated. They all fought harder than they ever had before and when Robin was safely back with them the relief was palatable. Usopp did not know what went on before Water 7 or even what happened when they returned from Enies Lobby however when they sailed away together again on the Thousand Sunny things were back to normal.

They had eventually come out to the rest of the crew and when they did Usopp noticed the hint of uncertainty and fear in Zoro's eyes. It however instantly vanished the second Luffy shouted his approval and declared the news worthy of a party. It had taken some convincing and a captain's order to get Sanji to cook for it though. Life didn't seem to change much after their announcement, there were still battles to fight and goals to achieve. Usopp never let on that he had always known and he merely continued to observe his nakama making notes of their unfolding tales.


	2. Encounters in the Rain

_Having a bit of a writer's block with my other stuff and just sat down to write anything and this is what happened. Hope you like it._

rating: T

**Encounters in the Rain**

Usopp could not believe what he was seeing, in fact he pinched his arm several times to guarantee he was not just dreaming. He shook his head and blinked a dozen times but the image did not fade away or morph into something else the two figures were still interlocked hands running through hair and up under shirts. All Usopp could do was stare and in the back of his mind he prayed that neither would turn around nor notice him because if they did he would surely be dead. But as certain as he knew this he still couldn't force his legs to walk away or even his eyes to turn away from the intimate scene he was witnessing.

Rain started to fall from the sky, big droplets coming down and splashing off of any surface they hit. The rain spurred him into action and he shrank back into the shadows of the ship his eyes still not leaving the couple. The rain didn't seem to bother them much they took their time breaking apart. A bronzed face lifted, upturned to the rain an unusual smile flirting across his lips while the other watched the affection clear in his face even from a distance. Emerald eyes shifted from the skies to focus on a clear blue one and a rough hand tenderly caressed the pale cheek pushing back the silky blond hair. They looked into each other's eyes with such intensity that the saying 'your eyes are the windows into your soul' popped into Usopp's head.

Usopp didn't doubt that that was in fact what they were doing; he got the distinct impression that they were having a complete meaningful conversation without once breathing a single syllable. Their lips met once more this time with less force and aggression, it was a simple meeting of lips yet each was surrendering their heart and soul to the other and Usopp felt a blush stain his cheeks. He looked away ashamed to have intruded on this most private moment. His heart ached for the one he had left behind upon witnessing the devotion between his crewmates. Usopp would love nothing more than to be with her showing her that same intense devotion and love that he had just witnessed but he still had things to accomplish and places to go.

A loud thump drew Usopp out of his musings and his eyes darted back to the grass where the passionate couple were now on the ground. From what Usopp could tell the slender blonde wasn't too thrilled with his sudden relocation and was growling up at the larger man a scowl on his thin lips. Usopp couldn't help but notice that the atmosphere had drastically changed. Gone was the tender almost hesitant love leaving behind its most raw form; passion. It sizzled in the air around them radiating from their eyes communicated through their hands. When their lips met again it was with pure passion and desire, they devoured each other as if they were consumed by a fiery passion and Usopp realized that they probably were. Through the light rain he heard the faint sound of a few pops and the buttons of a sky blue dress shirt flew through the air followed by a menacing growl that was quickly silenced by hungry lips. A pale chest was revealed to the rain and Usopp finally dragged his eyes away from the unfolding scene.

Usopp backed away and quickly disappeared into his workshop before the scene could progress and scar him for life. His shocked brain was still trying to process the tenderness he had seen he didn't need to add any x-rated images to it.

Dinner that night was a bit later than usual; apparently the cook had been busy and hadn't started it on time. Usopp just sat and watched looking for a sign of the passion that had been glowing out on the deck but he could only just discern the smallest of touches, hands lingering for a fraction of a second when passing items and gazes held the smallest fraction of a second longer than usual. It wasn't much but to Usopp it reinforced the love he had been witness to and it warmed his heart and caused him to launch into a story for Chopper's benefit about the time he had single headedly saved a fair princess from an entire clan of dragons.


	3. Faith, Betrayal & Love

**Faith, Betrayal & Love**

Pairing: LuNa and ZoRo  
rating: T

She had betrayed them and left with Merry but he hadn't cared. Usopp had been mad but Luffy had simply gone after her like there wasn't an option of not.

She had "killed" Usopp and Luffy hadn't believed it. He knew her better than the others.

She had sent them away with angry words filled of hate but Luffy wouldn't go. She was his nakama.

Nojiko had filled them in on her painful past but Luffy had refused to listen. It didn't matter and it was her story to tell.

She had asked for help and he had been there to hear it. Luffy would fight for her when she couldn't.

She gave him her biggest treasure; her heart. He placed his treasure on her head and gotten her freedom.

She had disappeared without warning then said goodbye without an explanation. He had refused to let her go without one.

She had betrayed them and set them up. Zoro had known there was a reason and vowed to get it.

She had shattered their good intentions and sent them away. Zoro had stood up and fought.

She told them she wanted to die and he hadn't listened. Zoro had found the key to set her free.

He had caught her when she fell, given her a reason to live when she wanted to die. He held her in his arms and taught her to appreciate life and she taught him to acknowledge love.

Both men taught Usopp the importance of faith and the capacity for love.


	4. Courting for Idiots

pairing: ZoSan with hints of UsoNa  
rating: T

**Courting for idiots**

It had been amusing to watch so long as they were unaware; thoughts of what they would do to him if they had known about his observations made his knees shake with dreadful apprehension. In hindsight if a helping hand had been lent there might have been less trauma involved for the entire crew but the past was the past and he couldn't change what had happened.

Watching their awkward interactions had given him ideas for a sort of 'How to...' book which he would clearly dedicate to the flourishing couple. One night when he was on watch he took out a note book and began to write his ideas down. He started with the title scrawling it neatly across the top of the first page; Courting for Idiots.

Chapter One: Violence as Flirting is for Grade School

"You going to make me marimo?" Sanji's voice cut out across the deck.

Zoro answered by unsheathing his swords the steely _schlck_ slicing through the night air. Usopp watched from the safety of the crow's nest as the swordsman and cook danced across the deck legs and blades flashing a mile a minute. They came to a momentary standstill with Sanji's leg pressing against Zoro's crossed blades neither giving an inch. Looking through the telescopic lenses of his goggles he could make out the intensity that was etched into the hard lines of Zoro's face. There was also something else hidden below the glare he was giving the cook. Usopp blinked a few times and looked again adjusting the focus but it hadn't been a mistake hidden below the smouldering glare was unmistakeable lust. If he had been able to see Sanji's face he would have seen it present in his eyes as well.

Then they were at it again no tenderness visible in their actions as they tried to bring the other down. Zoro and Sanji traded lethal blows until Nami stormed out of her map room demanding with a blow to their heads that they stop causing such a racket. Zoro re-sheathed his katana and glared at the thinner man while for his part Sanji turned to swoon after the tangerine goddess.

The scene with Nami was usual enough but to Usopp's trained eye there were abnormalities. Zoro glared solely at Sanji without sparing a glance at the woman he referred to as the devil incarnate. Normally she would receive an annoyed look for interrupting the fight but not this time. This time his eyes were on Sanji only. Sanji's reaction also showed a minor abnormality. True Sanji had turned to Nami with cries of "Mellorine!" which was of the norm but it hadn't been like Nami's presence had flicked on that love dork switch as usual. This time his cooing had come as more of an afterthought.

Usopp took these observations in and filed them away with a mental note to keep his eyes open for any other glitches in their regular behaviours. He could feel that he was on to something.

Chapter Two: Sex is Never Just Sex

Usopp tried to sink back into the shadows and erase the image he had just seen from his mind. For as long as he lived he never wanted to see Sanji bent over the kitchen table with Zoro pounding into him from behind again. He hadn't wanted to see it to begin with but it had been just his luck that he had almost walked in on it. The only consolation was he had been right about them but right now he simply didn't care. Right now he needed to get the image, that unfortunately came with surround sound, out of his head so he went off in search of the navigator.

If Usopp thought that this new development in Zoro and Sanji's relationship would soften their attitudes towards each other boy was he wrong. If anything it only got worse, the two men were constantly snapping at each other and bickering over everything. One night Zoro didn't come in for dinner which irritated the cook enough that he went out and started an hour-long fight with the swordsman. The rest of the crew had tried to stop them but it was no use and in the end they gave up and went inside to finish their dinner without them. When Usopp had left the kitchen he had heard them yelling at each other.

"What is this then?" Zoro demanded his voice hard.

"Convenient."

The one word answer seemed to stun Zoro for he momentarily paused. It was only a split second but the pause was long enough for Sanji to land a solid kick to the swordsman's chest sending him flying back across the deck. It wasn't enough to take him down though and Zoro was back in no time blades flashing once more this time with an added intensity. Pain radiated from every grunt and every cutting insult but Usopp noticed that Sanji's insults lacked their usual bite and he had stopped attacking the other man resorting to simply defending himself from the lethal blows Zoro was handing out.

He shook his head sadly seeing it all so clearly before him when they couldn't. He wished he could force the false pretences away so that they could acknowledge their true feelings for each other. However he valued his life too much to risk that not that they would listen to him anyways. Both men were way too stubborn to see past their own pain and uncertainties.

So Usopp and the rest of the crew could do nothing but wait and try to avoid getting dragged into their fights. Eventually they would realize it was more than just convenient sex.

Chapter Three: Anniversaries are Always Important

It doesn't seem to matter how insignificant or trivial it might seem to you odds are if you find it insignificant your partner is going to make a big deal out of it. Usopp learned this the hard way and he now knew the anniversary of each advancement to his relationship, one mistake was enough for him. He could only pray that Sanji was smart enough to realize the same thing.

Lunch had just finished and crew members were starting to drift out of the kitchen slowly until it was only Franky, Robin, Usopp, Zoro and Sanji. Sanji collected the rest of the dishes and started to pile them in the sink while everyone else started to get up. Zoro however seemed to be hesitating and he sent a quick glance over at Sanji before pouring himself another drink. Usopp wasn't the only one who saw the look and for fear of being permanently scarred he quickly hightailed it out of the galley the others close on his heels. Zoro and Sanji tried to be discreet but unbeknownst to them pretty much the entire crew knew they were now officially going out.

"Hurry up marimo I want to get these dishes done."

There was a brief silence interrupted by the sound of glass thunking on wood a sure sign that Zoro had just drained his drink.

"Why are you still here? I don't want sex right now muscle head. I'm still sore from last night and I need to get started on dinner."

"Oi I was just going to help dart-brow!"

"Since when do you voluntarily help?"

Usopp who hadn't gotten far couldn't help but wonder the same thing. Zoro never chose to help Sanji or anyone really. Sure he pulled his own weight, when he was awake but he usually preferred to spend his free time training.

"I just thought since today was special I'd help you but forget it."

The anger was evident in his voice but Usopp thought he could hear the faint undertones of pain and embarrassment. He nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard glass shatter and the galley doors burst open. Thankfully Zoro was too consumed by his emotions to notice Usopp standing barely five feet from the doors clearly having overheard the entire exchange.

Feeling brave he risked a peek through the window and wasn't surprised to see Sanji staring at the shattered glass with a look of complete confusion on his pale face. He remembered the look being on his own face only months earlier when Nami had stormed out of his workshop muttering threats about debts and bodily damage.

That afternoon Zoro pushed himself harder than ever in his training and Sanji didn't once emerge from the depths of the galley not even to serve the girls a treat. When dinner finally rolled around the tension in the room was so thick that not even Zoro would be able to cut it. The meal went by faster than ever everyone anxious to put some space between themselves and the feuding couple. It didn't matter if they knew they were a couple or not the general sense aboard Sunny was to stay clear of the bickering males.

"Oi Marimo, help me clear." Sanji barked when the last of the food was gone.

The one sentence was like magic and the galley was empty besides for Sanji and Zoro in just a few seconds. This time Usopp didn't stick around feeling that he might not continue to get so lucky with their ignorance of his knowledge. The crew stayed away from the galley for the remainder of the night Luffy even ignoring his usual evening snack and when darkness fell everyone went off to bed without mentioning the two members who had yet to emerge from the galley.

Usopp wrote the last word down with a smile blowing on the ink so it would dry quicker. The unusual couple had made up that night and things were back to normal come morning but Usopp was sure there would be several more fights to come it was after all what they did best. They were still unaware that their secret romance wasn't quite secret but Usopp knew he wasn't going to be the one to fill them in on that particular tidbit of information besides he knew Nami was working on a way to use it to her advantage.


	5. Private Show

pairing: ZoNa  
rating: M – for kinky voyeurism

**Private Show**

Usopp prided himself on being exceptionally observant, yet he could honestly say he hadn't seen this one coming. The two were almost always at each other's throats when they were together and _he_ had seemed to have actual disdain for _her_. Usopp must have read it wrong or Zoro had been faking the disdain because here they were sucking face against the aquarium.

Zoro had Nami backed up against the glass, her shirt riding up and exposing the smooth lines of her flat stomach, his hand disappearing under the hem. Zoro held one of Nami's hands against the glass, above her head while her other hand clawed at his exposed back. Usopp didn't need his goggles to see that, said back was covered in scratches no doubt from Nami's nails.

He watched almost in awe as Nami's leg swung effortlessly up, hooking around Zoro's waist and pulling them closer together. The sounds being emitted from the couple were highly erotic and highly personal and still Usopp couldn't tear his eyes away. He didn't think he wanted to see this and he certainly didn't want them to see him but he was oddly drawn to it. Like a moth to the flame, he knew he shouldn't but he couldn't get away. It was if his knees were locked in fear, making it impossible for him to turn and run. The kick was it wasn't fear that had him rooted to the spot, it was intrigue and, as much as he tried to ignore it, arousal.

He felt like Sanji, getting turned on by the erotic sight in front of him. And the sight was certainly erotic. In the brief time Usopp had been lost in thought, Zoro had managed to remove Nami's shirt and was now suckling her breasts through her lacy bra. The half-moons of lace seemed to be more for creating cleavage than support and Nami was practically spilling out of them. Usopp had noticed her overt femininity before, he'd have to be blind not to with the way she flaunted it, but he had never been turned on by her movements before. Before now that is.

Her back was arched gracefully as she pressed her chest forward, begging for more from Zoro. As Usopp felt his cock harden he became aware of all her graceful curves. With her head tossed back, her neck looked long and enticing and he followed it down to the swell of her perfectly round breasts. Below that her stomach was perfectly flat, nice and lean, her muscles slightly defined as she squirmed under Zoro's touch.

Unconsciously his hand found its way into his pants and Usopp found himself stroking the length of his now aching cock. He nearly choked when he realized Zoro had pushed his pants down and with Nami's leg still around his waist he pushed into her with one quick movement. His hand tightened around his cock and he shoved his other hand in his mouth to stifle the upcoming moan. His hand started moving in tandem with Zoro's thrusts and Usopp was shocked to find he was enjoying it almost as much as Nami was.

Her nails dug in to Zoro's shoulders and her mouth was slightly open, her eyes closed in ecstasy. Usopp pumped faster as he watched Nami slowly unravel, her moans becoming more erratic and shorter. With just a couple more quick strokes Usopp came hard all over his hands and pants nearly biting through his hand.

As the feeling of elation wore off Usopp realized what he had just done and his cheeks burned with shame. He quickly rushed out of the room and to the bathroom with the sounds of Nami and Zoro climaxing behind him. The sounds had him going hard all over again and he forced himself to have a cold shower and get cleaned up.

As the crew sat down for dinner that night, Usopp couldn't help but blush faintly as Nami and Zoro sauntered in a bit later than everyone else, both looked, in Usopp's opinion, extremely satisfied.

Zoro took a seat across from him with a smirk and Usopp panicked, wondering if they knew but before he could even think about it Nami was leaning forward and whispering in his ear.

"Next time if you want to watch, just ask."


	6. Subtlety is not thy name

pairing: JohnnyxYosaku with mentions of ZoSan and LuVi  
rating: T perhaps kind of M

**Subtlety is not thy name**

There were some couples aboard the Going Merry who were quite secretive. Usopp figured he was the only one who knew that Sanji and Zoro snuck off to the kitchen or crow's nest every night for sex or just some time alone. And now with Vivi and Luffy things were pretty subtle. He doubted their relationship was very physical but the emotion was thick and Usopp could feel the love between them. It had surprised him that Luffy seemed to know the meaning of subtlety when it came to something he wanted, yet he was.

However not all couples who happened to make their way on to Merry were that discreet. As he saw Luffy flash a private smile to Vivi he thought back to Johnny and Yosaku.

_When Johnny and Yosaku first meet up with them_

"He's going to be fine, right?" Johnny asked, an underlying panic in his voice.

Johnny's eyes were unreadable behind his thin sunglasses but the worry over Yosaku was evident. Usopp had only known the pair for an hour or so now but already he could tell the affection between them was strong. When Johnny had jumped on to Merry after Usopp and Luffy had accidentally blown up the rock they were resting on, there had been fire in his veins. He recognized that fire for he had had it himself when his mom had been sick and dying. It was a fire that refused to believe someone you loved deeply could be taken away from you.

But it wasn't just the fire, it was the way they had clung to each other after Yosaku had falsely "instantly recovered." And it was the anxiety Johnny was giving off right now.

"He'll be fine, Johnny. Don't worry you know he's tough." Zoro replied calmly.

Usopp knew Zoro wasn't the one to go to for reassurances, so it just proved Usopp's theory in his mind.

Yosaku had recovered thanks to Nami's quick thinking and the minute he was feeling completely better Johnny and him had celebrated. It had been loud and awkward and in hindsight Usopp was glad Chopper hadn't been a part of the crew yet. He didn't really fancy having to explain that to him.

Usopp decided he had been born under an unlucky star or perhaps his keen sense of observation came with a serious downside. Needless to say he felt he had walked in on more than his fair share of sex in his young life and the cherry on top was that most of it had been gay sex. Usopp had no problem with homosexuals, everybody was free to love whomever they wanted regardless of sex or race. If Johnny and Yosaku had wanted to have a freaking sex marathon who was he to argue, he just desperately didn't want to see it. Ever again.

_Back to Johnny and Yosaku's stay on Merry_

Usopp pushed the door to the men's quarters open his mind elsewhere and immediately wished he hadn't. If he had been paying attention he most certainly would have heard the vulgar noises and wouldn't have gone anywhere near the door and would have been spared the sight in front of him.

Yosaku was on his hands and knees wearing nothing but his hanburi and Johnny. He was clearly aroused and Johnny's hand was sliding up and down his massive erection. Johnny, who was equally naked, had his other hand gripping Yosaku's hip so tightly that Usopp just knew there was going to be bruises. He was sliding in and out of Yosaku in time with his hand and Usopp could hear skin slapping loudly against skin. Yosaku was shouting out verbal encouragement which only had Johnny moving faster.

Eyes wide, Usopp hightailed it back to the deck flinging himself on the rail and gasping for air.

"Usopp, are you ok?" Luffy asked nervously.

Behind him he heard Zoro laugh, a deep and reckless bellow that had Usopp glaring at him.

"My guess is that he just ran into Johnny and Yosaku. They can be a little overwhelming."

As the images flashed through his mind again Usopp shuddered and nodded his head weakly.

"You should be thankful they didn't see you" Zoro continued, "they would have asked you to join in."

Before the others had the chance to understand the meaning of Zoro's words Usopp had dropped to the deck in a dead faint.

Yes, there were several couples aboard the Going Merry but Usopp was just thankful that none were as open as Johnny and Yosaku.


	7. Love and Anger

_pairing: LuNa  
rating: T_

**Love and Anger**

Usopp knew that life was full of mysteries. Some great, some small, some insignificant, some destined to never be revealed. Love was the latter.

Love could make you do things you'd never do otherwise. Love could make it impossible to think straight causing you to act crazy. Usopp had seen several different reactions when in love but the oddest of all was anger.

She was often angry and wouldn't hesitate to show her displeasure so Usopp had expected her to soften when in love, for her to mellow out some. In reality it had been more of the opposite.

He watched as she laid into his soaked crewmate who lay gasping for breath. She showed no mercy and it was a scene that had played out hundreds, possibly thousands of times before but this time her anger seemed to spark off of her. She held nothing back, her small hands clenched into dangerous fists which would occasionally rain down on the mess of raven hair. The green haired swordsman who had pulled him out of the treacherous waters simply wrung out his white shirt and walked away, he knew better than to get involved.

The rubber boy simply grinned, unfazed by the lethal anger and pounding blows. Usopp figured he was used to it by now. She got mad quicker of late and her anger was harsher. When the boy would tear off into town without caution, when he'd fall overboard, when he'd get into another fight with an insignificant crook. Her anger would come fast and biting and the rest of the crew would back away.

Yet there were cases where the usual anger was muted. The energetic boy's rambunctiousness was less grating and she would watch him and laugh. When he'd steal food, spill ink on her maps, or simply be making a racket she would breathe deeply and let it pass. Of course the same didn't apply to the others. She's often yell at him or Chopper for being too loud. The lazy swordsman still received the brunt of her day to day anger and the love-sick cook's advances were more often rejected with harsh words and fists.

All of her day to day anger was different from the anger she was tossing at the rubber boy however. This anger was a facade. Usopp had it figured it out, her anger was her security. The anger was something to hide behind when her fear took hold because Usopp understood what fear for a loved one felt like. The anger was easier to deal with. The fear was cold and paralysing and it was a matter of survival to transform it into something different. In the orange haired navigator's case it was anger.

Usopp wasn't the only one who understood this, who could see what she was doing. When she was done her rant the boy would stand up, apologize softly the same grin on his face. Then he picked up the treasured hat and placed it gently on the tangerine hair. Lips brushed together in a soft kiss full of reassurances and the anger dissipated until next time.

Everyone reacted differently when in love. It was just another one of life's mysteries.


	8. Things Usopp Learnt

Pairing: Mentioned Zoro x Sanji and hinted Usopp x Kaya  
Rating: T

**Things Usopp Learnt**

Usopp had learnt a great deal of things since joining Luffy's crew. Some were simple things like sailing tips or which foods complemented which wines while others were things that he could only learn on this ship with these people.

Usopp learnt that Sea Kings were incredibly huge no matter what type they were.

Usopp learnt that appearances were often inaccurate representations of a person.

Usopp learnt that dreams were worth fighting for no matter what.

Usopp learnt that your heart could be breaking even as you are having the time of your life.

Usopp learnt that there was a whole world that existed above the clouds.

Usopp learnt that mermaids really did exist and weren't always pretty. =shudder=

Usopp learnt that walking away was sometimes necessary.

Usopp learnt that determination and courage sometimes were enough.

But perhaps the most important thing that Usopp learnt was that when you were on a ship with a certain swordsman and cook closed doors were never meant to be opened.


	9. Facade of a Game

Title: Facade of a Game  
Rating: T  
Characters: Entire Strawhat Crew  
Pairing: Zoro x Sanji  
Words: 3,442

Usopp wasn't sure how it had all started; a few minutes ago they had all been drinking and having a good time. He had been dancing around an impromptu fire with Chopper and Luffy while Brook sang a song about a pirate and his true love being separated. Somehow that had quickly turned into the entire crew lounged across lawn and chairs (and even a lap or two) partaking in a juvenile game that was downright petrifying with this group of people.

"C'mon Usopp! Choose!" Luffy exclaimed with a grin.

Usopp glared at the rubber boy who was sprawled in a position only he would find comfortable. It must have something to do with being made of rubber because Usopp seriously doubted he bent that way. He turned to meet the empty caverns of Brook's lack of eyes trying to judge what the correct choice would be but a chorus of echoing sentiments hurried him along and he chose blindly.

"Truth"

He saw Nami's eyebrows skyrocket and sprawled on the lawn to her left Zoro scoffed. Usopp wasn't sure if the scoff was because he doubted his ability to tell the truth (which he could do very well thank you very much) or if it was because he hadn't been courageous enough to choose dare. The truth was he feared Brook might dare someone to do something involving the girls' panties and it was healthier for him if such a dare didn't involve him.

Brook tapped one long, bony finger against his chin as his black hole eyes bore into Usopp. The sharpshooter fought the urge to shudder as he met the gaze. After what seemed like an eternity and a half (it was really no more than a minute) Brook raised his hand triumphantly and let out a chilling 'aha!'

"Usopp," pause for emphasis, "have you ever seen Nami's panties?"

The response to the question was almost hysterical and it would have been if it hadn't been directed at Usopp. Nami surged out of her chair with an indignant shout that resulted in her stumbling and falling into Sanji's lap who had been in the middle of protesting the inappropriateness of the question. The arrival of Nami in his lap cut that off effectively and he immediately started to swoon, impressively being able to do a noodle dance in a sitting position with the navigator in his lap. Zoro who was between Nami and Sanji had let out a groan at the predictability of the skeleton's question but laughed at the navigator's expense. His laugh had cut off upon Sanji's love tirade and he was currently glaring at the two looking like he wanted to rip Nami off of Sanji and possibly throw her overboard. Meanwhile Luffy was rolled up in a fit of giggles at the whole thing while Chopper blushed bright red through his fur at the question. Franky had groaned at the question but was now too busy laughing at the reactions it had ensued to be bothered by it. The only one who had remained calm – not surprisingly in the slightest – was Robin. She remained in her chair, dignified despite the alcohol blush to her cheeks, chuckling daintily behind one porcelain hand.

For his part, Usopp was frozen in fear. He suddenly wished they weren't playing this game (well not that suddenly really, he had never wanted to be playing it) while simultaneously hoping desperately (naively) that the ruckus would result in the question itself being forgotten. However, eventually Nami righted herself, hit Sanji over the head for "copping a feel" which he denied as Zoro fumed and settled back into her chair. Once the navigator was sitting all eyes turned to him expectantly (well except Chopper, he was too embarrassed to look Usopp in the eye). He was visibly shaking by now and he decided it was best to just do it quickly, like ripping off a band-aid.

"Yes. Luffy truth or dare?"

"What!" Seven crewmates chorused back (Brook had passed out in excitement).

"When did you see them?" Robin asked, having been the first to recover.

"Wait no one said we have to explain our answers. Brook only asked if I had, not when."

This excuse of course didn't work and by the look in Nami's eyes there probably wasn't one that would. He briefly contemplated a thousand and one lies that would have let him innocently see the undergarment but he opted for the truth. He had a feeling they wouldn't accept anything but anyhow.

"It was a few days ago and Luffy, Chopper, Brook and I were playing hide and seek. Well Chopper was the one seeking so I needed somewhere to hide and Luffy had already stolen my best spot. So I decided the bathroom was a good place to hide."

By this point Nami's cheeks had started to redden as she recalled the day which he was referring to. Usopp dared to meet her eyes for a moment and flashed her what he hoped was an apologetic look before continuing.

"I was in the corner behind the door so that if you just looked in you wouldn't see me. Nami came in and I meant to say something, I swear I was just about to Nami, but then you started to undress and well I thought it would be better if I just closed my eyes and left when you got in the shower."

"You saw Nami-swan undress!" Sanji seethed.

"Will you shut up, dartbrow." Zoro grumbled, throwing an elbow out to connect with the slighter man's ribs.

"Usopp?" Nami asked, sickly sweet. "Did you really close your eyes?"

"Yes! Of course! The great Usopp is a gentleman and would never do such a thing to you."

Usopp ignored the sniggers and laughter and meekly accepted Nami's 300 beli fine. As soon as Brook had asked the question he knew it had been coming. Wanting to change the topic he repeated the truth or dare question to Luffy who pondered it mock-seriously (or perhaps it was seriously for Luffy) before settling on Dare. Usopp grinned evilly and clapped his hands together in excitement before setting out the challenge.

"I dare you to kiss Sanji!"

Usopp almost took it back when both Sanji and Zoro sent him death looks and Zoro's hand went to his hip. Thankfully Nami had instated a no-violence rule and as a result had made Zoro leave his katana a few feet away. It was Nami's gleeful expression that gave Usopp the courage to simply smile somewhat sadistically at the cook. If Nami thought it was a good idea then surely Sanji wouldn't do something to him. For his part, Luffy didn't seem all that fazed, he furrowed his brow and bit his lip before setting his shoulder and crossing the haphazard circle to sit in front of Sanji. Sanji looked downright horrified and he attempted to get out of it slightly by offering up his cheek.

"Not the cheek, Cook-san. For the purpose of truth or dare a kiss must be on the lips and last for a minimum of thirty seconds."

Robin spoke with such authority that no one dared argue it even though Usopp highly doubted there was any such guidelines in place for the game. Sanji let out a pitiful whimper and looked over to Zoro for help. The swordsman however was too busy keeping his temper (jealousy) under control to offer the cook any support and Sanji was left to succumb to the dare. Sanji looked at Luffy and nodded slightly in an indication to do it, then he closed his eyes. After a second he seemed to think keeping them open was a better idea and his bright blue eye was once again visible.

Usopp watched as Luffy leant in and closed the distance between them. The boy seemed to move easily and Usopp was left wondering who he had kissed before because this was going all too easily for it to be the first one. Usopp felt better with that realization because he thought the world of Luffy and he didn't want his nakama's first kiss to be on a drunk dare with the cook. Sanji's eye seemed to be darting from Luffy's lips to his eyes (which were half-closed) to nowhere to Zoro. He was looking around so much in the few seconds that it took for Luffy to make contact that Usopp figured he had to be getting dizzy. Then Luffy's lips were on Sanji's and for a moment they just stayed pressed together without movement and Usopp was just about to demand some when Luffy did indeed move. His lips slid across Sanji's and it must have felt good for Sanji's eye was fighting to stay open and his hands – hands that were normally so calm and in control – were twitching at his side. His eye was firmly on Zoro now and Usopp didn't notice anything but the swordsman must have sent the cook some sort of signal for his eye drifted closed and he reached out to tangle his hand in Luffy's hair, slipping above the hat that was around his neck. Usopp watched the pair, intrigued and barely registering the counting of Franky and Nami. When they reached thirty Luffy pulled back slightly, running his tongue over his lips before pressing one more almost chaste kiss against Sanji's lips. The cook smiled softly as Luffy scurried across the circle back to his spot. There was silence as everyone tried to finish processing the scene they had just witnessed.

"Pass me a drink, Marimo." Sanji said, breaking the silence.

Usopp watched the swordsman and cook as Luffy picked out the next victim (Robin). There was a silent conversation passing between the two young men in shared looks and actions. As near as Usopp could figure Sanji had asked Zoro permission to react to the kiss which the swordsman had granted and now the cook was communicating that while it had been a good kiss it had meant nothing. The way Sanji easily swiped Zoro's drink, taking a hearty gulp before passing it back and how Zoro simply let him a smile threatening to pull through the frown all seemed to Usopp like things were fine. Satisfied that his dare hadn't caused any lasting damage he returned his attention to Luffy and Robin.

"Robin, if you were trapped in Rainbow Mist forever with only one person here, who would you want it to be?"

There were murmurs of surprise rustling around the crew and Usopp could tell that it was in deference to Zoro that Sanji wasn't already pleading his case. Usopp was impressed that Luffy had come up with such a good question (and that he had remembered the name of Rainbow Mist) and judging by his crewmates expressions he wasn't the only one. Robin let out a contemplative hum before reaching to take a sip of her drink. She mulled it over as she swirled the amber liquid around her glass before seeming to come to a decision.

"That's a tough question Captain-san. I would choose Doctor-san for his companionship and for his medicinal expertise."

"Aahh! That doesn't make me happy at all! Baka!" Chopper squirmed happily.

Robin giggled and offered the reindeer a charming smile which he bashfully looked away from. Usopp was surprised to hear Zoro chuckle and indicate for Chopper to cross over to him, the reindeer happily went over to the swordsman and settled in his lap comfortably. The swordsman wasn't a very affectionate person and Usopp could count the things he showed true affection for on one hand. There were his katana, Sanji, Luffy upon occasion and Chopper. Somehow the reindeer always brought out an affectionate response in the swordsman and it wasn't uncommon to see the furry ball cuddled up with Zoro while he napped.

Zoro scratched lazily at Chopper's head (who was making some strange pseudo-purring noise) while Robin took in her crewmates with cool azure eyes. As she scanned them all Usopp decided that she would probably be worse than Brook and he prayed that her sense of fairness would have her picking on someone who hadn't been recently asked. Sure enough (thankfully and with a sigh of relief) she focused on Zoro. He narrowed his eyes and stared back at her in a clear challenge to do her worst. Robin responded with her trademark smile; the smile that caused shivers to run up (and down) his spine.

"Swordsman-San. Truth or Dare?"

"Dare." Zoro said calmly, refusing to back down.

"I dare you to remove your pants and have Cook-san sit in your lap for the next three rounds."

"Oooh, Onee-chan that's evil! I love it!" Nami exclaimed happily.

"Robin-chwaannn, why do you do this to me?" Sanji complained bitterly.

Usopp had to admit the cook did seem to be getting punished in a lot of everyone else's dares. Not that he was complaining because he found it entertaining and in his mind if a dare worked against two people instead of just the one that meant it was that much better of a dare. Robin showed Sanji no mercy and simply apologized to the doctor for making him move again. Usopp noticed a faint flush that was creeping up Zoro's neck and he was starting to fidget where he sat.

"I'll do your damn dare, woman. Just let me run to my room quick." He said gruffly.

"You planning on changing your underwear, bro?" Franky asked with a grin.

Nami jumped on this comment to state that changing would not be allowed so there really couldn't be a need for him to go to his room. Zoro tried swearing he wouldn't change but Nami insisted that the only way he could go to his room was with her as a guard and he reluctantly backed down. Defeated he got to his feet and moved his haramaki out of the way so he could remove his pants. Usopp was intrigued, waiting to see what kind of embarrassing underwear would be revealed. Surely it would have to be something bad for Zoro to be flustered. Maybe they were women's underwear or were covered in hearts. He remembered seeing a movie where a girl had written her crush's name on her panties and he briefly envisioned Sanji's name bright red in an equally red heart on Zoro's briefs. What he hadn't been expecting was Zoro to have been going commando.

Nami's laughter was pure evil as Zoro flushed red whilst trying to cover up with his hands. Sanji looked amused for a split second followed by something indistinguishable and replaced with mortification as he realized he was going to need to sit in Zoro's (naked) lap. Seeing his hesitance Nami also jumped to deny Zoro draping his removed pants across his lap. She claimed that a dare was a dare and it was his own fault for going commando. Sanji could have his revenge when it became his turn. She knew it was safe to say this because embarrassed (mortified, excited, repulsed) as he was Sanji would never do anything to purposefully embarrass her or Robin. As such, Robin was one of the only two people who had any chance of getting away with such a dare.

Zoro sat down stiffly not moving his hands from their strategic positioning. He shrugged helplessly at the cook and inclined his head towards his lap. Sanji sighed pitifully before lowering himself daintily onto his lap. There was a low groan from Zoro that could barely be heard as Sanji shifted to get comfortable. His hands came up to grip Sanji's waist to stop any movement and he quickly zeroed in on the game's next victim, no doubt in a hurry to get three turns over with.

"Nami, truth or dare?" he asked coldly.

Usopp shuddered, he was eerily impressed with the swordsman's courage.

"Truth."

"What is the most you have done sexually with someone? Don't hold back on details now."

Usopp wanted to hide and as it was he shifted so that he was hidden a bit by Franky. Nami was spluttering, her hands clenched into angry fists at her sides. Zoro (never knowing when to back down) took the opportunity to cheerfully remind her of her self-imposed no-violence rule. Nami drained her drink and asked Franky to pour her another before she answered. She finished half of her new drink and placed the glass down albeit a bit heavily.

"Fine. If you must know I have had sex with a boy. I don't owe you any details but I will tell you it was really good."

"Details were part of the question my dear navigator, so spill."

"Well what kind of details do you want to know, Zooorrro?" Nami asked, her words starting to slur.

The question seemed to be exactly what Zoro wanted and his eyes shone with a head full of questions he was ready to unleash.

"Who was he? When was it? What position? Did you come? Did he? How long did it last?"

"Zoro!" Sanji cried out, twisting to glare at the other man.

"Relax Blondie, she started this game."

By now enough alcohol had gone to Nami's head that her tongue had loosened and she seemed to be willing to answer Zoro's questions despite Sanji's protests that he didn't want to hear this.

"He was a pirate that I crossed paths with during our travels. Plenty of positions, some that don't even have names yet. I said it was really good so yes I came and I'm insulted that you'd even suggest that I didn't make him come. And the time, well, the shortest was five minutes and the longest was forty-five. Satisfied?"

Nami finished her spiel with a flourish and took another healthy swig of her drink before leaning back in her chair with a self-satisfied grin. Chopper was curled up in a ball with his hands over his ears and Usopp felt bad for the young doctor as the game had quickly progressed to something more than he was used to. Usopp reached out and pet the younger boy softly trying to comfort him. Chopper snuggled closer to him and Usopp kept a comforting arm around the small furry frame. After a moment Nami was encouraged to continue the game and she chose Chopper. Chopper was forced to reveal his biggest fear (oddly enough it was sponges) and in turn Luffy was dared to see how many bottles he could fit in his mouth at once (32).

"That is super crazy!" Franky exclaimed.

"More like super disturbing." Nami tossed out.

Usopp wasn't sure whether he should be impressed or disturbed. On one hand being able to fit thirty two bottles into your mouth was pretty cool but seeing Luffy's mouth stretched around those thirty two bottles definitely ranked somewhere on the disturbing scale. Slowly they started to remove the bottles careful not to let Luffy swallow any or let them break in his mouth.

"The three rounds are up Swordsman-san. Cook-san can get up and you can put your pants back on." Robin informed the pair.

Zoro nodded curtly but Usopp noticed that neither boy was in a huge rush to move. He also noticed that somewhere in the three rounds Zoro's death grip on Sanji's hips had loosened into a caress and the cook had relaxed back into Zoro's chest. Zoro leaned forward and whispered something into the cook's ear which elicited a pink flush to spread up his neck and over his cheeks. He looked away from the scene and found himself meeting Robin's gaze. She gave a small smile and raised an eyebrow. Usopp indicated Nami whose face was red from alcohol and Chopper who was half asleep leaning against Usopp. He nodded slightly and Robin cleared her throat to gather everyone's attention.

"I'm getting tired and could use some rest. Perhaps we could continue the game another time?"

Usopp quickly agreed with ending the game and the rest seemed to be of similar sentiments. Soon everyone was getting ready to turn in for the night except for Sanji and Zoro who hadn't moved from their position on the lawn. Franky scooped Chopper up who seemed too tired to walk and the rest of the boys headed to their quarters. As he was walking away he heard Robin address the swordsman.

"Swordsman-san since it's your turn on watch do you think you could help Cook-san clear this mess?"

Usopp didn't hear the answer but as he went to bed that night he knew that Sanji wouldn't be joining them in their quarters.


End file.
